I've been trying to cram in so much information so quickly, I'm starting (hah!) to realize that it's not all sticking.
So, what better tool to use than Emacs to solve my problem with not remembering Emacs commands?
My solution is simple—create a cheat-sheet. The great thing about Emacs is that this doesn't have to be a piece of paper, it can be a file that I can maintain in org-mode, just like this blog. In fact, I can also maintain it as a page on the blog. And with the most trivial bit of elisp, I can make sure that I can get to it with no more than two easy-to-remember keystrokes:
(define-key global-map [?\C-h ?\C-h]
'(lambda ()
(interactive)
(view-file "~/org/doyouevenlisp.com/cheatsheet.org")))