Dwarves. Hunchbacks. Samurai. Tarzan. Cowboys. Napoleon. Transvestites.

It’s been a long running joke with “Chet”:http://mischeathen.com/ that if I am unaquainted with some particular bit of American culture–movie, TV show, what have you–it is because I was in Germany at the time it happened.

In many cases, of course, this _is_ actually the reason, but it eventually morphed into an all-purpose response.

So, after Chet pointed me to a “Stevie Wonder video”:http://miscellaneousheathen.com/music/060630stevie-sesame.html, I ended up doing a little YouTube archaeology (which spawned “another post from Chet”:http://miscellaneousheathen.com/music/060630vh-zz.html) to find something I’d always heard about but never seen because, well, *I was in Germany when MTV launched*.

It is somehow nothing like what I expected, and yet exactly what it should be. And it includes everything in the title to this post.
I present to you, Van Halen’s video for _Pretty Woman_. Because in 1982, no one knew that this wasn’t what music videos were supposed to be like:

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Michael Alan Dorman

Yogi, brigand, programmer, thief, musician, Republican, cook. I leave it to you figure out which ones are accurate.